With this in mind, here are my top seven tips for turning business negotiation skills into life skills:
1. First and Foremost, Be Prepared to Walk Away.
This is the single most important strategy for getting what you want out of life. If you aren't prepared to say "no" and mean it, then you are likely to end up settling for a lesser outcome. Before entering into the negotiation, know exactly what you are and are not willing to concede so that you do not need to process this information on the fly without adequate time to weigh the pros and cons.
2. Know When to Forgo Altogether.
A good deal comes together quickly; a bad deal takes way too long. Take a clue from the amount of time it's taking to get what you want, and if exceedingly long, don't waste valuable time and effort with the misguided notion that "just one more" give or take will make the deal work. If you have to "force it," chances are it will come back to bite you later on.
3. Deal at the Right Level.
Nothing is more frustrating than trying to complete a deal with an individual who can't make the final decision. It's like negotiating against yourself — you address an issue and try to come to a conclusion, and then the other person takes that to someone else "behind the scenes" only to come back and say it can't be done on those terms. It's far more efficient and effective to find the right person to negotiate with directly, "mano a mano." If you don't know, or if it's not obvious that you're dealing with the right person, directly ask up front if he or she has the authority to make a final decision on the matter.
4. Do Due Diligence to Come Prepared.
The more information you have surrounding the circumstances of your endeavor — the "marketplace," for example — the more likely you are to not only prevail but also get the best deal possible. While you may actually prevail by shooting in the dark, not knowing the extent of the opportunity could result in your leaving a lot on the table. Whether it's the average pay for a given job, the price typically paid for a product or a service, or who you are in competition with for a new position, knowledge truly is power.
5. Don't Take Anything Personally.
To maintain objectivity, treat every negotiation as if you are completing a deal for someone else who has hired you as a professional "closer." When you allow yourself to get emotionally involved, rational thought often goes by the wayside, and you're far more likely to concede to something you will later regret. Cool heads get the best, and most, out of what they are seeking.
6. Anticipate Objections.
Prior to the negotiation, brainstorm all the reasons or objections that may prevent you from getting what you want, and prepare a thoughtful counterpoint for each, one at a time. During a negotiation, people conjure up all sorts of reasons that something can't be done, many of which are often bogus. Until you know the valid sticking point, you are just spinning your wheels.
7. Don't Underestimate Karma.
What goes around indeed comes around. The best deal is one where both parties walk away feeling positive about the result of the negotiation. The worst deal is one where one side leaves the table feeling slighted with the short end of the stick. If you're the kind of person who "has" to win and is prepared to humiliate or otherwise make someone feel bad as a result, sooner or later, the gain will likely come back to haunt you. Accordingly, consider in advance what would satisfy the opposition, and be prepared to pull those "cards out of your pocket" strategically during the course of discussion.
In my 30 years as a corporate executive and as a business success coach for others, I have learned what works and what doesn't when it comes to striving toward a desired outcome, both in the workplace and in one's personal life. Interestingly, the process is very much the same in both environments. The key is to be tough but fair in such dealings, come prepared, and know when to walk away.
About the Author
John McKee, founder and president of BusinessSuccessCoach.net, is the author of Career Wisdom - 101 Proven Strategies to Ensure Workplace Success and 21 Ways Women in Management Shoot Themselves in the Foot. He can be reached at 720-226-9072, john@businesssuccesscoach.net, or through his websites at www.BusinessSuccessCoach.net and www.BusinessWomanWeb.com.
